Guides to better conversations

Each guide turns an idea from research on conversations and relationships into an exercise you can try with the cards. The sources are at the bottom of each page.

• Active listeningAn active listening exercise for couples and friends: draw a card, listen, repeat it back in your own words, and ask two follow-up questions. Ten minutes, free.
• Love languagesWhat are love languages, and what does the research say? Questions for the two of you about what makes you feel loved. A conversation, not a personality type.
• Love mapsLove maps are your picture of each other's lives right now. Here are questions that keep you up to date, and what the research says about the Four Horsemen.
• Communication in relationshipsEveryday exercises for communication in relationships: a gentle start-up, good news, follow-up questions, and breaks in a fight. Plus when to get outside help.